


The Benefits Of Babysitting

by AsagiStilinski



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Babies, Dancing, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Humor, M/M, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-18
Updated: 2019-07-18
Packaged: 2020-07-07 19:19:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19856692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsagiStilinski/pseuds/AsagiStilinski
Summary: Seto has to attend a masquerade for work purposes and invites his husbands to help him spite his enemies, there's just one problem....They've never left the kids with a babysitter before and Seto and Atem aren't exactly taking it well





	The Benefits Of Babysitting

**Author's Note:**

> For prompt Monday's theme "Dance" - this is pure trash and I'm not sorry

"Either of you wanna hand over one o' the kids an' come for an actual swim? I don't mind,"

Joey, after all, had been swimming for the past fourty-five minutes, wile Yugi and Atem were sitting on the steps of the pool with little more than their hips submerged- and even then, "submerged" was perhaps not the best term- taking care of the twins, and he was sure they'd be wanting a break soon

"No," they both answered instead- in unison, at that

".. Ok stop doin' that creepy twin thing,"

"Also no," they replied effortlessly- in unison again

Joey hated it when they did that, he couldn't quite pin down why, but something about it was seriously creeping him out- _all the time_

He narrowed his eyes and swam a little closer, questioning just how much danger there was of accidentally splashing one of the twins in the face if he tried to playfully splash his husbands

...

Probably not worth the risk

"Ah! Seto!" Yugi waved cheerfully, suddenly pulling Joey out of his thoughts as he glanced over his shoulder at the CEO, who had apparently thought nothing of coming to an outdoor pool in his work clothes

Sure, it was _their_ pool, but shouldn't he still have enough concern for his clothes that he change into something less easily damagable first?

Seto merely nodded in answer first, walking straight over to the twins- both the _actual_ twins, and the Puzzle Twins, as had become Atem and Yugi's conjoined nickname after a slight error in judgement on Joey's part brought that title to life- and bent down, kissing the babies on their heads and smiling sweetly at them

"Hello sweet ones,"

And then the Kaiba he had much more experience with was back on the surface

"Dweebs," he greeted flatly, staring straight at Joey, though it was obviously a title that applied to all three of them

"Jackass," Joey nodded as well

"Language," Atem hissed, sparking both Seto and Joey to roll their eyes at him

"Did anything interesting happen at work Seto?" Yugi asked peacefully, deciding to break the fight that would inevitably get started any time now

"No," the CEO replied, shrugging his coat off and draping it over the lawn chair behind them

"I do have to attend a masquerade ball on Saturday night though, some eccentric idiot from Europe's idea of a good time, but we need to secure his approval if our plans on the escape room game are going to go through, so,"

He paused then, shrugging, and starting to unzip his long, thigh-high boots

"Any of you three want to attend as well? You know I always enjoy pissing off straight bastards by virtue of your existence,"

"Glad we can be of service to ya'," Joey muttered flatly

"You should be,"

"Well, I'm always happy to attend a gathering where I can show you off," Atem noted with a wink, smirking playfully up at his husband

"You know something? I could go for a masquerade," Yugi agreed

"Sure, why not? The more o' us that go, the angrier our enemies'll be, so it's a win/win," Joey added with a nod

Though, that seemed to put something of a frown on Atem's face

"Wait... we can't _all_ go..."

"Why not?" Joey protested

"Because we have children now and can no longer party into the night as we did in our youth?"

"... Ok, first o' all, _you_ **never** partied- youth or no, an' second o' all, ya' do know that _babysitters_ exist, right?"

"I didn't marry three of you idiots to go handing my children off to some stranger," Seto grumbled as he started undoing his belt next

"Wah- what is THAT s'posed t' mean!? Ya' married us 'cause we're built-in babysitters!?"

"Well that's not the _only_ reason.... but it is _a_ reason,"

"Oh fuck off Rich Boy..."

"Language," Atem frowned

"No thanks, I get enough fucking every night," Seto smirked back

"Language!" Atem hissed

That was just enough to jostle the baby currently in his arms, the innocent little thing starting to wimper and wail, much to Atem's absolute horror

"Shh, sweetheart, it's alright, shh..." he promised, swaying her gently and glaring at his husbands as he rose from the steps of the pool and decided to go in a little deeper, maybe he could distract his daughter from her upset with some pretty water...

"Look, there's no need to fight, I'll just stay home, it's nothing to fuss over," the former pharaoh insisted with ease, relieved that the baby atleast seemed to calm without much problem, she was yawning and dozing back off to sleep, held against Atem's chest....

He couldn't help but smile as he stroked her little head full of dark, soft hair....

He didn't care to be without the twins

He'd be perfectly and entirely happy to spend Saturday evening alone taking care of the babies, let his husbands have a break, he could practice reading stories to them in _peace_ \- Yugi already had the talent of story reading down to a perfect art form, doing all of the charector voices expertly and without any poorly timed pauses... Atem needed practice but was a little embarrassed to get caught reading the same passage again and again trying to get it right, so this would be a nice time to try it

He could paint his nails a new color and listen to those scary stories he liked without having to put his headphones on- wich was always nice, Atem didn't always enjoy wearing headphones, one of the sensory problems that had come with the new body he returned to the living world in- and maybe he could even (finally) watch that Scott Pilgrim movie Joey was always talking about and surprise his husband with quotes and "memes" when he returned him

Sure Joey said the graphic novels were better but it was alot easier to watch something on TV wile taking care of the babies than to read something so...

"Atem?"

Perking up, his attention turned back to Yugi with a warm, loving smile

"Ah, yes aibou?"

"I said you don't have to do that, we all deserve a night out and we haven't _all_ been on a date since we brought the twins home three months ago,"

Seto opened his mouth to speak, but Yugi hurriedly corrected himself before his husband could do it for him

" _Without_ the babies, we haven't all been on a date without the babies since we brought them home,"

"And why would we need to be? There's four of us, I'm rich, there's really nothing stopping us from having atleast one father looking after the children at all times," Seto pointed out

"Seto... I love how dedicated you are.... but-"

"I'm with Seto," Atem said suddenly glancing down at the baby, who had fallen asleep on him and was currently drooling a small puddle on his shoulder

_Awww_...

"I don't feel comfortable leaving the twins in the care of some stranger,"

"It don't gotta be a stranger, tha's what aunts an' uncles are for," Joey insisted, swimming a little closer to Atem- who seemed apprehensive at best to the idea of even one of their relatives babysitting

" _Or_ \- and hear me out- there are four of us, and we don't need a babysitter," Seto noted, finally getting the last of his clothes off, now in his swimsuit, and plucking the baby from Yugi's arms- evidently deciding that he had been hogging the child for too long now

"How long've you been wearin' that under your clothes....?" Joey muttered, eyes focused on the swimming trunks that he _knew_ within reason Seto hadn't put on that morning...

"I'd be _more_ than happy to stay, but I _have_ to go, as it's a work function," Seto noted as he stepped further into the water, decdidedy ignoring the blonde's comment

"You're startin' to look kinda like Haru from Free!..." Joey added, not that Seto seemed to care

"I really don't mind caring for them on my own, the three of you should have some time to yourselves," Atem agreed

"Atem, we aren't going to do that to you, you're the one who wanted to go in the first place," Yugi frowned, letting himself slide down fully into the water now that his arms were free

"I don't mind!"

"Well _I_ do, besides, sweetheart... don't you think it's about time we start dipping our toes into the water of letting someone else watch the babies? You do realize that there will be times when we can't be there with them 24/7, right? There will be times when a babysitter is necessary,"

"Name ONE circumstance wherein that would be necessary," Atem frowned seriously

"Dueling tournament,"

....

_Damn_

"We surely wouldn't all be dueling at once-"

" _Atem_ ,"

"I suppose Isono could sit with them in the audience..." Seto noted slowly, though he seemed pensive of even that

"Or my sister could, ya' know, _babysit_ , or even your brother," Joey commented

"Don't be stupid, Mokuba would have far too much to do during a dueling tournament,"

"I think Yug was talkin' 'bout tournaments you DON'T run,"

"Still-"

"Also emergencies," Yugi notedd suddenly, trying to break up the impending argument that was sure to be on the heels of this "conversation" before it even began

"Gods forbid one of us should be hospitalized, or have a family emergency to take care of, or hell, what about the _next_ time we adopt? I seem to recall you both wanting a big family,"

"But why couldn't they come with us aibou?"

Atem seemed so sincerely confused and concerned...

Sometimes Yugi really didn't know how to explain why certain things were the way they were

It was one of the hazards of having a husband who was thousands of years old...

"Ya' know, I'm just sayin', maybe we should try t' start lettin' go o' the leash _now_ before they get older an' start wantin' to do stuff without us, like goin' to freinds' houses, or enterin' tournaments on their own, or take off on some wild adventure at fifteen an' save the world like we did,"

.. Yeah Atem and Seto didn't seem amused

"You're joking, right?" they said in unison, wich only sparked the blonde to fall backwards and point dramatically at the two of them

"Ok _THAT'S_ fuckin' creepy! Don't ever do that again!"

"Language," Atem reminded him swiftly

"Ok look, we're obviously not going to agree on this, and we're split down the middle so voting isn't going to help, I suggest we duel for it,"

"Wah -.... you want us to DUEL for the babies?" Yugi asked, flabberghasted

" _Yes_ ,"

"No!"

"Why? Afraid you'll lose?"

"Seto-"

"It'll be a bracket tournament, you and I Yugi, then Atem and Wheeler, and when Atem and I defeat the two of you, he and I will duel!"

"What would be the point in that? You're on the _same team_ ,"

"Foreplay,"

"I knew that's what that was to you all these years..." Atem muttered quietly to himself

"Actually it's a rather new development,"

"Or maybe ya' were just too repressed to, ya' know, _get it_ when ya' were a sixteen, I could believe that," Joey suggested, leaning back against the wall of the pool

It was kind of amusing to watch, actually, he may not agree with two out of three of the idiots he had married, but it was still fun watching them argue

"Can it," Seto grumbled, attention turning back to Yugi a moment later

"Well Yugi? What do you say?"

"I say you're looking for an excuse to duel Atem again... but alright, fine, if you want to duel, I'll duel one of you, winner decides what we do about this masquerade situation, sound like a plan?"

Seto smirked far, _far_ too confidently

"You're on!"

~+~

"I can't believe we lost..."

"I'm not surprised, aibou _is_ the King Of Games..."

Seto didn't even care about Atem's non-chalant note, he was just frustrated by the circumstances

He already hadn't been the biggest fan of this dumb masquerade ball, he _certainly_ wasn't happy with it now that he was having to spend the entire time scared to death about leaving the kids alone- well, they were with his brother, but _he_ wasn't with them and neither were his husbands so that was _essentially_ alone, right?

"I'm checking on them again,"

And really, could you blame him?

The twins were only seven months old, they were far too young to be without their parents!

"Let me see as well," Atem insisted, standing up on the tips of his toes and peering over Seto's shoulder to look down at the nanny cam footage on his photo

Well, ok, not _actually_ a nanny cam- those things were far too prone to hacking- they were Kaiba Corp's very own specialty spy cams that he was going to start marketing soon as a 100% hack proof nanny cam

Surely enough, the babies were sleeping in their cribs, no trouble at all

"Is this film stalled?"

"I .. don't think so? Didn't Akira just move his arm?"

"I think that was Maya, did Mokuba put them in the wrong cribs!?"

"Wah- .. how can you tell!? It's in black and white and they're twins!"

Seto paused, staring at Atem judgmentally over his shoulder

"You can't tell?"

"Well not in black and white and with the veiw obscured by the cribs...."

"... Do you need glasses?"

"What!? NO!"

" _Again_ you two?"

Atem glanced guiltily over at Yugi, who was staring at him with a mix of criticism and sympathy, arms crossed over his chest and clearly disappointed

".... Seto thinks they're in the wrong cribs,"

"It doesn't even matter..." Yugi sighed quietly, stepping forward and grabbing Atem by the hand

"Come on,"

"W-Why? What about the-"

"We're at a dance, we're _dancing_ , the babies will be fine, they have a very capable babysitter,"

"Who is _downstairs_ and not _watching them_ ,"

" _Atem_ ,"

Ok, so maybe Yugi had a bit of a point....

Smiling sweetly, his partner started to sway, arms around Atem's neck and staring into his eyes

"Don't take your eyes off me, hm?"

Atem shuddered, arms loosely wrapping around Yugi's back

He _knew_ what Yuri On Ice references did to the pharaoh....

Seto, in the mean time, was watching bitterly, mostly annoyed that Yugi had absconded with the only husband who agreed with his paranoia

"Phone check!"

Before Seto could react, Joey had plucked his cell phone out of his hands and shoved it in his back pocket

"You really think I won't go in after that?" Seto asked dryly

"Oh I know ya' will, but you're gonna have to touch my ass to get there an' by the time ya' do that you'll be dancin' with me, all part o' my master plan," the blonde smirked, wrapping one arm tightly around Seto's waist and tightly gripping Seto's hand in his own, making sure that the CEO's only free hand was the one further _away_ from the pocket the phone was in

Though he could already feel Seto trying to grope around to find it- and that in it's self was entertaining

"Ya' do know that kids get through life without their parents hoverin' over 'em 24/7 right?"

"I know that, and I'm not going to hover their entire lives, just .. until they're old enough not to need me so much,"

Joey huffed, leaning closer and suddenly dipping his husband, smirking like the devil at the slightly startled look on Seto's face from the sudden action

"An' that'll be ..... when? Age fifty?"

"They're just _babies_ you jackass,"

"Babies who are _sleepin'_ an' to be honest would sleep _more_ if you an' 'Tem would stay the fuck outta their room at all hours o' the fuckin' night,"

"Firstly- we only check on them when we're worried-"

"-wich is all the fuckin' time,"

"-and second of all, do you think you said 'fuck' enough times in the last two minutes, or do you need to say it again?"

"I'm tryin'a' use my liberties where I can get 'em, I'm so fuckin' tired of 'Tem policin' my fuckin' language even when the kids ain't around.... what the fuck is with that anyway? He didn't grow up in a time when cursin' was a problem or nothin'..." he huffedd, jerking Seto back upright and twirling to the beat of the music

"Maybe he wants the children to grow into civilized human beings,"

"Woah, better keep 'em away from you then, you got any fuckin' clue how many times a day I gotta ignore what you're sayin' just to stay married to ya'?"

"About as many times as you say the word 'fuck'?" Seto guessed with a smirk, spinning just out of Joey's reach, only staying connected to him now by their joined hands

"Ha! Yeah just about! But seriously.... if he don't stop that fuckin' 'language' shit, soon as the kids start talkin', I'm gonna drop every A, B, C, and F bomb I can think of right in front of 'em, just outta spite,"

"That's some A+ parenting you've got there," Seto noted, spinning closer again and wrapping his free arm around Joey's neck, no longer trying to get the phone

... For now, atleast

"Oh come off it, they're gonna learn it from you sooner or later ya' know, might as well atleast hear it from me first an' not learn to use 'em as insults right off the bat,"

"What are you implying exactly?" the CEO frowned

"I ain't implyin' nothin', I'm flat out _sayin'_ that if those kids ever waddle into your office in their primary years, they're gonna hear words that even _Atem_ don't know about,"

"And that means?"

"That your insults've gotten ALOT more creative since ya' were sixteen!"

"You're exaggerating,"

"You called Akihito in accountin' a _cockweasel_ ,"

"Because he was trying to skim the books! .. Also I learned that from _you_ so you're one to talk,"

Ah yes... Joey remembered that, when he moved out of his apartment he had called his chipped house key that and hadn't stopped hearing Seto's criticisms about it all day

How times had changed....

"Yeah but atleast I can control my temper... most o' the time,"

Seto rolled his eyes, moving to wrap both arms around Joey's neck now and holding him closer, pressing their hips against eachother

"Do you really _want_ me to control my temper? I thought you liked it rough," he hummed teasingly

"Oh are you _really_ goin' there with me Pillow Princess?"

" _Do not-_ "

"Well ya' _can be_ ," Joey snickered, leaning down to nip Seto's ear, much to the CEO's humming pleasure

"... You really that worried about the kids?"

"Yes,"

"But... ya' gotta know that they're gonna be fine right? We're only gonna be out a few hours... an' Mokuba is one capable fuckin' dude,"

"I know that," Seto sighed, his posture loosening a little, letting his head rest against the blonde's shoulder

"I just... can't put it into words..."

"Ya' got issues, I get it, we all got 'em, that's why we work so well together, we're all pretty fucked up- an' also fucked up an' pretty, wich helps,"

Seto lifted his head, staring flatly at Joey

"Poetic,"

"Thanks,"

Meanwile, Atem and Yugi were having something of a similar conversation of their own, across the room...

"I just never want to be an absent father..."

"Atem it's a few hours, you're not abandoning them,"

Yugi understood- if anyone understood, it would be him

His father had walked out on him after all, but .... Atem, at times, let his emotions get so far ahead of his logical reasoning....

"How can you be so sure? What if they wake up expecting me and when they find I'm not there it leaves some sort of lasting psychological damage?"

"Sweetheart... there are plenty of times when one of _us_ tends to them, do you think you're damaging them when that happens?"

"Well yes but you three are ALSO their fathers so they expect it of you, if their uncle- who does not typically tend to them alone- is tending to them now and we aren't there, they'll know something is wrong,"

"You realize that you're applying this logic to two creatures who can barely sit up on their own, right?" Yugi asked slowly

"They're smarter than you give them credit for aibou, also, don't you remember when Korra was a puppy? She knew when we were leaving her with a babysitter FAR before she reached seven months of age and she did NOT like it,"

" _Atem_ ," Yugi frowned disapprovingly

"I KNOW you know better than to compare the babies to the _dog_ , their development paths are COMPLETELY different,"

"I'm just saying.... I don't want them to hate me, that's all,"

Yugi's shoulders sagged, appearing more sympathetic as he hugged his partner tightly

"Oh Atem.... sweetheart they aren't going to hate you, least of all for this.... besides, I didn't learn to hate my father until I was _atleast_ thirteen," he teased playfully, swaying slowly on his feet as Atem eagerly hugged his partner back

"Have I ... really been acting _that_ crazy?" Atem asked softly, a little bit of a laugh in his voice

He still worried, but something about Yugi's joking made him feel a little silly for expressing it so thoroughly

"I'll put it to you this way sweetie, I'd stay away from Batman if I were you, unless you _want_ to end up in Arkham,"

"Wow, I really expected that sort of reference from Joey,"

"Mm, we played Injustice 2 recently and I can't get it out of my head... nor Harley's corset.. and how good it would look on you,"

Ah, just as Yugi had hoped- Atem's face turned bright red, his heart beating a little faster, clearly all thoughts that were rated PG-13 and below were gone now

"I'd be happy to order it when we get home.... if you can promise me to stop obsessing over the babies and atleast TRY to enjoy the rest of our night? Just until we get home?"

Ah.... Yugi was pouting as he said that, staring up at Atem with those big bright eyes...

"I can try, you have my word,"

Grinning from ear to ear, Yugi leaned up and gave him a soft kiss on the lips, twirling his beloved husband and just so happening to come across Joey and Seto as he did so

"Yo, switch time?" Joey grinned, extending one hand out to Atem

The pharaoh exchanged a small nod with Yugi before taking Joey's hand and allowing himself to spin into the blonde's embrace, at just the same time that Yugi was happily taking Seto by the hand and pulling him closer

"Wait a minute, he's still got my phone!"

"You don't need it Seto, the kids are fine, nothing is going to happen," Yugi insisted gently as they started to sway

"What if someone calls?"

"Then Joey can answer it,"

"That's exactly what I'm afraid of..."

Yugi rolled his eyes, standing up on the tips of his toes and wrapping his arms around Seto's neck as they swayed

"You've got to trust someone sometime you know..."

"I do, I trust you, Atem, and Wheeler, but don't tell them I said that,"

Yugi rolled his eyes, shifting his arms so that one was around Seto's waist and the other was looped with Seto's

"Don't you trust your brother?"

"Ofcourse I do,"

"Then trust him to take care of the babies, ok? Nothing is going to happen, you have my word,"

"You don't know that for sure," Seto said quietly, his face pale and pensive

Yugi's expression softened a little, and he moved his hand down to squeeze Seto's reassuringly

"Yes I do, Seto you have the best security system in the world watching them right now- you also have a very high end _electronic_ security system," he smirked

Seto couldn't quite explain why.... but something about that actually made him feel a little better

"And you really think that's enough?" he asked, though this time it was clearly more teasing than anything else

"I know that it is," Yugi promised, spinning in his husband's arms

"You just have to have a little faith,"

"Faith," Seto spat, rolling his eyes and twirling Yugi back towards him

"A rediculous concept,"

Though... he didn't go back for his phone, atleast

"You still have his phone? He's probably losing his mind right about now,"

"Oh I dunno 'bout that, Yug' looks like he's keepin' 'im pretty entertained,"

Atem glanced over Joey's shoulder, giving a small smile to the blonde as he watched the other pair dance

Seto _did_ seem much lighter and less concerned than he did before...

"Perhaps you're right,"

"Pretty damn sure I am,"

Atem just laughed, taking Joey's hands in his as they danced happily across the floor

"Hey... ya' didn't try t' stop me from cursin'...."

"Well sure, I'm not an _animal_ , I only correct your language when the children are around,"

"They weren't around this mornin' when ya' did it!"

"Korra was,"

Joey's face ... went blank

"So... your concerns are for kids... an' dogs,"

"And cats," Atem nodded

"... But why though?"

"Mm... I'm not sure," Atem admitted slowly, one arm wrapping around Joey's waist as they swayed to the music

"I suppose because I was always raised to be a respectable young gentleman and I'm hoping to raise my children that way as well,"

"Yeah..... 'cause the leather and chains just SCREAM 'respectable young gentleman'," Joey teased playfully

"Hey, fashion knows no bounds, besides, I was an adult when I started wearing those things,"

"Oh ok, so when the twins turn sixteen they'll be adults?" Joey teased

"Hey, that was a cultural difference, and no, the twins will not be adults until they're twenty-five,"

Joey's face went blank again

"... You're jokin', right?"

"Do I look like I'm joking?"

Terrifyingly..... no

No he didn't

Joey spun the pharaoh out again, just in time for Yugi to twirl Seto, and the two of them meet in the middle of the dance floor

"Hello there," Atem smirked, wrapping one arm around Seto's neck

"Hello yourself," the CEO replied, his own arm wrapping around Atem's waist as they switched partners once again and allowed Yugi and Joey to join eachother once more

"Do you ... feel any better now? About the kids?"

"A little," Seto agreed, making sure Joey and Yugi were out of earshot before continuing

"I'm going to get that phone back if it's the last thing I do though,"

"Good, I'll help you, we can check on the babies,"

"Perfect,"


End file.
